Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I see through liars

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

My husband asked me why do I keep on complaining about him cheating. Why don't I just leave?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What trains transport cars and passengers near Pompano Beach, Florida that goes to New York?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Undercover cops in New York are riding the subways with iPods on to entice robbery. Is that a form of entrapment? If not, why not?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

How do I get off Paxil?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Why does it itch on my vulva, uterus, and sides of my vagina, but it doesn't itch inside the vagina?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Can an astrologer predict that someone is in a physical relationship before marriage?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Does the Lil Wayne song ‘Lollipop’ refers to a Lollipop sweet or a metaphor?

I have a reading level above third grade

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

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Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

How do you relax?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for fakery

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t cotton to rapists

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t buy bullshit

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can read

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that